...that's what I call it.
Just like Lindsey Lohan. I, too, am in a rehab, of sorts.
It just happened. Monday, I had finally had it and I decided to bite the bullet and go into food rehab. I'm counting calories, working out, drinking shakes, eating protein bars and trying not to revert to my lascivious ways. I've never been a drug or alcohol addict, but I do know about being a food addict. Unfortunately, you gotta eat and it's all too easy to drive-thru and get your fix.
Today, the second day of rehab has been challenging and mentally stressful. Last night, I woke up around 2 AM hungry and made myself a shake and ate a protein bar. Then, I proceeded to stay up and do laundry, put the dishes in the dishwasher, finish a set of stitchmarkers. By the time, I went back to bed it was 4 AM and I had to be up at 7 AM for an 8 AM conference call. *argh* I was a raging biotch today at work, I owe some folks an apology and explanation for my crankiness.
Constantly weighing food decisions is taxing. Standing there telling yourself you can't have that anymore...it's no good for you....stay focused...stay on the wagon, girl. It's hard.
Fortunately, I have my friends Bryan and Dennis to go through this with me right now. We're all in food rehab together. They know.
I decided not to join the medical weight loss program they are in because I can eat the same things they do at a lower cost using Apex Protein Supplements and Budget Gourmet. I, also, avoid the mandatory doctor visits and meeting fees. I've already had my blood drawn and all that, so I'm good to go medically. I am going to call for a refill of my Phentermine tomorrow. The hunger pangs are too intoxicating right now.
Dennis mentioned perhaps going to an Overeaters Anonymous meeting soon. I think it would be a good change of pace to be around other professed food addicts and see how they deal with life. I garner inspiration being around others who are fighting the same demons.
Now, I'm not trying to get Mary Kate Olsen skinny, but I could stand to lose a good 50 - 100lbs. I'm so mad at myself right now because my size 22 pants are too tight now. *sigh* I'm relegated to my stretchy fat fat pants for the time being. *grumble*
Right now, I'm going to avoid social eating until I've lost at least 20 lbs. I don't have the restraint yet to eat out with others, so no more knit night dinners for me for a LONG time.
If you want to peek into my food blog and track my progress,
check out my CalorieKing food journal. Sometimes, you might have to peek in on me and keep me honest. Make sure I'm journaling and eating properly. Heck, it might even motivate you to track your food intake or even compete with me.
I'm right there with you. Unfortunately, I lose better with the threat of humiliation. So, I joined a gym/weight loss plan that seems very similar to Weight Watchers with some energy bar supplements. Hang in there!! I'll be pulling for you.
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain. It feels so unfair to have to think so much about what passes my lips. Alas, it was the not thinking that got me here. I'm still doing WW Online, but I'll check out Calorie King, as I'll need to keep a food journal somewhere once my WW sub runs out. We can keep each other honest.
ReplyDeleteI'm so there with you as well. I love the "food rehab" title. It so describes what we are going through. It sucks having to learn a whole new "lifestyle" when the old one was so nice and comfy. I love the Calorie King, it's very eye opening once you start documenting stuff. keep up the good work, though.
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