Three Handsome Mens

So, two ladies from UFO Wednesday have asked me about that "HOT" guy in my "What I'm Thankful For" montage and here's the answer.

This here is my first baby brother, Adrian.

He's enlisted in the Air Force, 30, Taurus, non-smoker, I don't know how tall he is (5'9" or so) or how much he weighs (170lbs), but he's fit nonetheless. Someone asked me at knit night tonight if he's "horney" LMAO! I didn't know what to say to that. LMAO! I'm still laughing. But, well...he's got 3 kids. Yes, he is SINGLE, but not officially divorced yet. *grumble* He was truly heartbroken at the dissolution of his marriage. His wife crushed his heart in the palm of her hand. He's pretty much over her now, though. THANK GAWD! I was worried about him for a while there.

Onto my other brother, Ryan.


He's my half brother from my dad and my stepmom. He's 16. He still lives at home and is about to graduate high school. He got into his first car accident the other day. Thankfully, he wasn't hurt, but the car is totaled. He's very talkative, energetic, way too mature for his age, smart and creative.

...and to answer Carmell's question!!! DUN! DUN! DUNNNNNN! J@son!

I made him pose for a picture wearing one of my Marsan hats tonight after our workout. He said he likes the color. ;)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOHANNA!

It's the little girl Johanna's birthday today. Isn't she adorable?



She's 24 today. Say "HEY!"

Of Mice and Mens...

Of Mice and Men
What an appropriate title for the continuing saga of my so called love life. *deep sigh*

Since joining the front desk staff at the gym, I've managed to capture the attention of a couple guys. After a few weeks of phone tag and brief encounters at the gym, one of them, had the guts to ask me out on a date recently. Now, physically he really isn't my "type", you see he's a big, burly, balding Black man. Honestly, I prefer Caucasian men at this juncture in my life, but I thought I'd give a brotha a chance. I know, right? What's wrong with that? I mean he seemed like a nice enough guy. Always smiling and playful when he'd check-in at the front desk. So, I figure what the heck, I'll get a nice meal and some conversation at least.

Fast forward to this past Friday afternoon. We had talked on the phone at length a couple of times, during which I had agreed to meet him for lunch. Initially, we'd agreed to meet at 11:30 AM, but I arrived at the restaurant early (11:00 AM) to secure us a table since I knew we'd have a long wait otherwise. I sent him a text message asking if he could meet me earlier and he replied at 11:09 AM that he was on his way. It was 11:39 AM, when I sent him a text message stating that I was going to go ahead an order. He showed up shortly after my food arrived. *grrrr*

He sat down explaining that he was caught up at work and apologized for keeping me waiting, this is when I noticed the wedding band on his left hand. *figures* In our previous conversations, he hadn't mentioned that he was married!!! Realizing that I had noticed his wedding band, he began to explain his situation. He's working here in Kansas City on a year long contract away from his wife and three small children. He'd married his college sweetheart, but things weren't going too well for them lately blaming the bulk of his marital issues on his mother-in-law. *shrug* I listened to him talk and talk and talk...politely nodding my head from time to time. Finally, he shifted the conversation to talk about me and "us". I let him know that I wasn't interested in having an affair with a married or otherwise involved man. I said that we could be friends, but that's it. Nothing more. Strictly platonic. He seemed disappointed and tried to explain away his marriage. *pffft* During our ensuing conversation, he showered me with praise and admiration. We talked about this and that. He talked about his entrepreneurial ventures, his profession, his family, etc. Finally, he paid the bill and escorted me out to my car where, once again, he tried to persuade me into a furtive liaison. I gave him a hug, thanked him for lunch and whisked away in my car. Not 5 minutes later, I got a text message, "U can be my secret seriously think about it." *grrrr* I don't want to be your frickin' secret jackhole. There's SINGLE men out there that I'm sure have just as much to offer as you seem to think you have to offer. Did I mention that he's a CANCER! OY VEY! The little guilt trips...the browbeating...the needling...the cajoling. ENOUGH ALREADY! GEEZ! *ack* I can't stand it. *eyeroll*

Later that afternoon, I got more text messages, "Y no response". I replied that I wanted to talk to him on the phone about his indecent proposal. I figured, I'd lay my cards on the table. Let him know that "I'm just not that into you". By this time Gwenie Gwen came over to spend the night since the mover's had come to take all her stuff and she needed a place to crash. I ignored his other pages that night. This was the last time I'd get to hangout with my Gwenie Gwen.

Saturday came. I helped Gwenie Gwen clear out the remainder of stuff in her apartment, hugged her goodbye and went into work at the gym. Just as I suspected, he was there. In previous conversations, we agreed no matter what became of us there would be "NO DRAMA!", especially at the gym. I was totally professional and went on about my duties. He did his thing and left after some small talk. I had to ring up his powershake. *shrug* No messages from him Saturday. THANK GAWD! But, the big let down was still looming over my head.

Finally, Sunday night, he called. We talked about random stuff and he hinted around about what my intentions might be with regard to him. I bluntly reminded him that I don't entangle myself with married men, especially men with small children at home. That's just bad karma. I told him that we can be friends! Strictly platonic, nothing romantic. Besides, I know what it's like to be a professional white collar Black person in Kansas City. That it's hard to network and meet new people. He acknowledged my observation and agreed that we could, at least, be friends.
*Phew* I didn't have to go there, yet! Didn't have to tell him that even if he wasn't married, that I still wouldn't be interested. Why break a man's spirit like that, right? I know how it feels for someone to say, "You're an attractive woman, but I'm not attracted to you." *HMPH* @ssh@le. Anyway, during our conversation, he commented that I was a rare gem. Someone that is hard to find and he didn't want to jeopardize our friendship. I will say this, he's a very perceptive, albeit, eccentric, guy. Not unlike myself. That being said, I'll keep him around for a minute and see what happens.

I did mention there was a couple guys, right? I'll leave them a mystery for now. Things are still unfolding...

Goodbye Sweet Gwenie Gwen

Sunday, August 19, 2007

I invited the girls over for a Sunday dinner Farewell for our girl, Gwenie Gwen.
This weekend, Gwen is moving to DC metro to pursue a great career opportunity. Fortunately, her brother, sister-in-law and brand new baby nephew, Lucas live nearby. It has been a pleasure knowing Gwen and I've grown very attached to her. *sniffle* I'm going to miss my Gwenie Gwen.

It was my pleasure to prepare a feast fit for Gwenie Gwen and my other knitter friends.
For those that might be curious, I marinated the chicken breasts over night in KC Masterpiece Garlic & Herb Marinade. I, also, served C. Wirthy & Co. Blackened Seasoned Atlantic Salmon. I grilled both of these on my Ultrex Reversible Grill & Griddle with Glass Lid. Using the lid makes for such tender meat. It's like butter! We had dinner rolls, baked potatoes and a simple spinach, cherry tomato salad with Julianne carrots, broccoli and sprouts. I marinated the asparagus in olive oil, balasmic vinager, soy sauce and minced garlic then sauteed them. Joanna, that salad dressing you liked was Good Seasons Red Raspberry Vinaigrette with Poppyseeds. There was fruit, chocolate cake and ice cream for dessert. Least we forget the bottle of Sofia Blanc de Blanc Sparkling Wine Gwen and I put away. *ugh* I was a little out of it after dinner. LOL!

Then, Joanna had the excellent idea for us to take a friendship foot circle picture.

Today Was A Good Day...

Today was a good day after all.

I invited some of my close knitting friends over to my house. Since I just happened to be cleaning out my clothes closet and wondered if anyone might be interested, my friend Teri thought it would be a good time for a clothes swap since we are all fluffy girls. So, we made a day of it. I made Mexican food and a Devil's Food Chocolate Cake with Milk Chocolate Icing. Top that off with Prickly Pear Punch, Tequila, Margarita Mix and Diet Coke with Lime and that's my version of Nirvana.

We ended up watching "Pride & Prejudice" since the rest of the girls are huge Jane Austen fans. *grumble* I'm primarily, an action movie fan, but I can be a romantic at times. Gwen insists I need to "...find my romance again..." *sigh* To which, I replied "Yeah, why bother? Like those kind of landed gentry type men still exist...I'm lucky to find a straight man who will open a door for me."

Maybe I need to get "The Secret" on DVD. LOL! I need a new religion or maybe I should enlist my friends to fix me up with a man. It never fails that somehow by pure chance, I match my friends up with the love of their life, but me...I make crappy love choices. *sigh* Maybe, I should hand over my love life like I have my financial planning and taxes. After a few botched attempts at filing my own tax returns, I refuse to , ever again, even touch a 1040 form. *grumble* LOL!

Anywho. We gorged ourselves on tacos and cake. GOOD LAWD! IT WAS GOOD! I think I snarfed down a whole box of tacos. I must say the taco meat was seasoned to perfection. It was a big hit. LOL! The cake was so moist and rich, I think I orgasmed a bit with each bite. LOL! I LOVE CAKE! I like to walk around the house randomly and loudly saying "CAKE! CAKE!" in my selfish 6 yr. old voice. Sometimes, I make up a cake jingle. LOL! I LOVE CAKE! ok...enough about cake for now.

While we watched the movie and knit. Of course, keeping with stereotype, I asked a lot of questions during the movie. *ehem* OK, so I haven't read the freakin' book. GEEZ! Gimme the cliff notes, dagnabit.

Sitting. Knitting. Watching the movie. I thought to myself this is what life is all about. Spending time with your friends and family...your loved ones. Just relaxing and enjoying each others company. Not having to put on airs or anything. Just being yourself enjoying the little things in life. So what, I didn't have a big date lined up. I didn't go to the casino or get married today. We had a great day with wonderful people. *sniffle* I love those guys. *sniffle* They are the real deal. Real Friends.

Happy Birthday, Teri!

We have been celebrating Teri's birthday all week, but today is her actual birthday!

All The Beds Are Burning...

It would seem that the institution of marriage is burning down to the ground and all the beds with it.

I had just gotten home from the gym when I received a frantic call from a long time friend, "J". She blurted that she had just been assaulted by her husband, "D" and the police had just taken him away.

They had been arguing and "D" punched her in the chest. Why? She questioned "D" about some emails she found on his Blackberry. Sometimes, ignorance is bliss, isn't it? But, she wanted to know the truth. Where had he been during lunch? Why did he stand her up? What were those emails all about? "J" suspected that "D" is having an affair. Those damn Crackberries have probably been the cause of many crimes of passion.

Instead of discussing matters like reasonable adults would, "D" chose to duke it out instead. "D" has all the classic signs of an abuser, but "J" is afraid to be single. Afraid of being seen as a failure in love and marriage. Afraid of everything it would seem. Fact is, "J" is one of the strongest women I know. She's a survivor. A woman who made it out of her first abusive marriage with only a high school diploma, no work history and 3 small children. Not only was her first husband abusive, he was outed by his own children after they discovered some revealing emails he was sending to his "Down Low" lover. After all that and you still get out of bed everyday, you have to be strong.

After divorcing her first husband, "J" rebuilt her life and got herself a job. I met "J" and "D" when we all worked for the same company some years ago. Back then, "D" was married to his 3rd wife, but you couldn't tell it to look at him. He acted like he was single and never spoke of his wife. Over time, pursuant to his aggressive wooing of "J", a torrid affair began to percolate. "J" knows perfectly well of what "D" is capable. She knows deep down that he's having an affair right in front of her very eyes.

Last night, "J" was frightened, dazed and heartbroken. She called me to come keep her company swearing me to silence. No one could know. She feared what others might think or say. She knew that her family would never forgive him for hitting her. She's already sacrificed her relationships with her children because of "D". This would only make things worse if they knew. Coming inside from one of her many smoke breaks, "J" commented that she could hear her backdoor neighbors arguing and wondered if there wasn't something in the air that night. OH GAWD! I wonder what my neighbors are thinking. This is the 2nd time the police have been here in less than a year. The last time was last August when "D" got into a fist fight with "J's" middle child, "A". "A" is in his 20s and had just called his mother "J" all kinds of names and "D" couldn't take that kind of language and challenged him. "D" went to jail.

In the morning, I drove us to the court house. She was a nervous wreck. We got there an hour before his video arraignment. In the state of Kansas, victims of abuse receive counseling and guidance before the arraignment from abuse advocates sponsored by the SafeHome organization of which I am a patron. I was actually seeing my donations at work. Wow! So, as I sat and listened to the advocate go over the plight of abused women and children and list the triggers and signs of abusers, I thought to myself how blessed I am to never had been a victim of abuse. My mind raced as I considered all the ramifications of trying to escape an abusive situation. All the minutia. The pain, the uncertainty, the fear. I cringed a few times as I listened to "J" make up excuses for "D". Trying to explain away the fact that he HIT her. There's no freakin' excuse for assaulting anyone. You just do not do it. PERIOD!

Soon, it was time for the arraignment. Standing before the judge "J" pleaded for his release. "D" was released on $750 bond with stipulations of drug and alcohol testing. "J" couldn't understand why since he hadn't shown signs of drug or alcohol abuse since she's known him. The advocate explained that the prosecutor had found some prior offenses. Obviously, "D" has a checkered past that "J" knows nothing about. It is the law in Kansas, that abusers not have contact with their victim for a period of 72 hours. However, you can make an appeal to waive that "cooling off period" if you provide a good reason why the judge should waive it. "J" sobbed and plead for the waiver, but the judge denied her request. She was devastated. She worried about how he would get home. Would he even come home again? Who would pick him up? Would he call "the other woman" to pick him up? Where would he stay? How would he pay for things? She was hoping that after he got out of jail and came home that he wouldn't immediately pack up his things and leave her for the woman she knew he already has waiting in the wings.

Driving us back to her house. "J" sobbed and began to blame herself again. I was incensed. I told her AGAIN that it was NOT HER FAULT! that he brought this on himself. He didn't have to hit you!

Back at her house, it wasn't long before "D" called to have "J" come pick him up from jail. Yep! Cooling off period be damned! I watched as she hurried to find her keys. She hugged and kissed me before leaving thanking me for helping her. *deep sigh* She was relieved and happy that he called her instead of the other woman. Happy that the whole mess was over and that she could go get him and try to make things
right again. *shakes head* Wrong can never be right, can it?